The original second page. This one underwent substantial changes. I tidied up the crash panel, significantly changed Abbie to look older and more like herself, and added a panel to transition from sleeping to waking. I didn't like having a sound-effect going on so I changed it to the narrative indicating the crash, and hopefully reflected in her eyes that she sees the light. I tossed out the narrative panel boxes to show off more art, and killed the second box because the next page has a joke about sleeping through anything as well. I like the page a LOT more now, I think the action is smoother. Though I did notice now that I'm posting some news--there's one flaw in the panel where I stitched the mountains together to make it wider. You can't see it in the original page because there's a text box in the way. It's a small flaw--a visible vertical line. Indicative of the shortcuts I was taking in making all of these pages in 24 hours. ;-) I did not redraw the mountains from the previous page, I copied and pasted that background and flipped it. Shame on me.
Oh yeah, and I got rid of the 'pop' sound effect. I think showing her eyes opening in a second panel conveys the effect more, uh, seriously.
News
Woot - October 18, 2011 - 1503
The original second page. This one underwent substantial changes. I tidied up the crash panel, significantly changed Abbie to look older and more like herself, and added a panel to transition from sleeping to waking. I didn't like having a sound-effect going on so I changed it to the narrative indicating the crash, and hopefully reflected in her eyes that she sees the light. I tossed out the narrative panel boxes to show off more art, and killed the second box because the next page has a joke about sleeping through anything as well. I like the page a LOT more now, I think the action is smoother. Though I did notice now that I'm posting some news--there's one flaw in the panel where I stitched the mountains together to make it wider. You can't see it in the original page because there's a text box in the way. It's a small flaw--a visible vertical line. Indicative of the shortcuts I was taking in making all of these pages in 24 hours. ;-) I did not redraw the mountains from the previous page, I copied and pasted that background and flipped it. Shame on me.
Oh yeah, and I got rid of the 'pop' sound effect. I think showing her eyes opening in a second panel conveys the effect more, uh, seriously.
What do you think?